Parents are always telling me they cannot find any good consequences to use with their children while disciplining. Here are a few ideas to keep in mind:
1. Use bedtime as a motivator. Take time off of their bedtime for each thing they may do during the evening. Base your decision by age. For example, use 5 minutes each time for kids under 6 years old. Use increments of 10 minutes for each misbehavior for kids older than 6. Believe me they will hate going to bed at 7:00 p.m. when the sun is still out!
2. Time Outs work. I know, I know … everyone says they don't work. But they can if you do it right. Make sure the time-out chair is in an area with no stimulation. No TV, no bedrooms (which these days are more entertaining than our own family rooms!), no action of the household.
3. Remove possessions and privileges. Examples in the summer time include no bike riding, playing outside with a friend, swimming, etc. Winter time would include no videogames, TV, sleep-overs, etc.
4. Add extra chores to their normal list. Every kid should have daily chores that are expected to be done. Some examples include: making their bed, tidying up toys, taking dishes to the sink after mealtimes. Extra chores should not be fun in nature: consider yard work (raking, picking up sticks, sweeping sidewalks) or indoor chores like sorting laundry or sweeping floors.
5. Use immediate consequences. Do not wait to discipline. The moment the misbehavior occurs is the perfect learning moment and the time when discipline will most influence their future behavior.
Good luck! The time and effort it takes right now to implement appropriate discipline will be invaluable for your children as they grow and mature.
Submitted by Springfield Moms "Ask the Counselor," Rini Christofilakos-Soler, LCPC, who is the owner of Agape Counseling Center in Springfield. Visit her website at www.agapecounselingcenter.net or set up an appointment by calling 217-787-1616 or email: agapecounselingcenter@yahoo.com. Agape Counseling is located at 2700 West Lawrence Avenue, Suite W (next to Soccer World).
